You're so nebulous sometimes
booty call
i swear to god if you come over i will kick you in the pussy.
totally watching dr. phil and getting eaten out right now. be jealous.
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight...
I poured everyones drinks into the ice bucket and then stuck my face in it. Apparently I'm a greedy drunk.
You better fuck one or both of those bitches and bring me pictures that will make me uncomfortable
I can do at least one of those things.
Friends don't let friends drunk sleep in the dorm common room
And by pregame I mean drink heavily and watch Russian dash cam car crash vids
I had to write an apology letter to my roomate for hotboxing in our bathroom. What a bitch.
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
I feel like I owe her child an apology or something after blowing my load on the tattoo she has of her.
Had a rough day but my boyfriend made that all better by going down on me while letting me watch Top Gear... I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
You are a genius and a whore.
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
Randomize
