just to let you know, don't open your linen closet for a while until i come over with a cleaning kit and geek squad
I just found 17 dollars of saltine crackers in my room. confused incredibly. suprised not at all.
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
I'd like to say yes, but I nearly lost my shit when I assumed there was no back to my house. I am not strong enough for hallucinations.
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
Haha he was not a poor little guy. If he'd talked to me or something I might feel bad. But since I saw him groping other girls as well as myself there's no sympathy coming from me
He's just picking out the right girl. I do the same thing with fruit. Grope them, squeeze them, smell them. I have to know I'm getting quality fruit.
We got Pizza Hut & Papa Johns, delivered within seconds of each other, and both delivery people did a shot. I was put on Earth for this moment.
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
This guy on the bus keeps leaning over and sniffing my hair.
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... So sensitive...
I didn't want to hook up with him so I just jumped out of bed, yelled "I don't even believe in god!" and ran out of the room
I'm wine drunk & this is not good news for anybody
Randomize
