I bet when she looks at herself in the mirror she wishes brown paper bags were in fashion.
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
giving yourself 2 days to recover i see
I'll need it. Largely because i'm going to be stumbling through fancy restaurants with a bottle of whiskey insulting couples all night.
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
Dude, the chicks a procotolgy intern. Don't cheat on her. She knows where it hurts the most.
Listen. You seriously only live once... there aren't that many cinco de mayos left until someone knocks u up and u have to have a shotgun wedding. Man up.
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
I got laid while wearing a shirt with a picture with my little brother deep throating a banana on it.
When one of my seniors asked "Rough night?" I realized my poor decisions involving Tuesday night drinking did not go unnoticed.
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
Also mom is not happy about me telling her how much i want the women sprinters on the Olympics to beat me up
I'm fine. Heading home now...crying. Michael Bolton totally understands me!
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
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