Con: they had to cauterize my wound twice. Pro: The docs agreed I'll be able to get really drunk tonight since I've lost so much blood.
sound pretty economical
Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
I just beer bonged a sparks. You better get your ass over here because no one is on my level yet
... was I dreaming when we did coke off of the xbox, or did that really happen?
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
Blacked out last night, but left myself a note that said "oops on oops on oops" that can never be a positive
He wheeled me around walmart in a cart, and stole at least 30 dollars of junior mints fpr me. Best date ever.
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
When I tried to give you a hickey, you karate chopped me in the neck.
I think that's the first time Navy dress blues and a Ninja Turtles onesie have been involved in the same makeout.
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
I'm about to eat a 2month old weed brownie I just found in my lax duffel bag. will you answer if I call you in like an hour and a half
Fine I’ll come with you but you better tell that guy to wear some longer shorts because the second I see a rogue nut I’m gone
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