Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
Get condoms and clear your schedule for the night. I'm bringing chinese food!
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
you know how they say when you die, your whole life flashed before you? well do you get to see what happened all the nights you blacked out?
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
so, give him that "thank you for fighting for my freedom bj" & he wont even remember what you said in that six min voice mail.
I just found the gloves and lightbulb I stole. Did you pee on a ATM inside a bank?
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
I need to stop getting drunk and telling people it isn't "about them."
I was a bouncer for about 90 seconds until the real bouncers figured out that I was doing their job
He signed my ass with a Waffle House pen.
I ain't lettin her quit anyway. We don't fuck enough for her to meet the housewife requirements
This is a weird combination of planning and sexting but whatever
I only live four blocks from the bar but when you're hammered this walk feels like the journey through Mordor.
You got drunk, made toast, and declared yourself a domestic goddess.
Randomize
