Something in my vomit makes me think I shouldn't have had that slurpee
bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
He told me he's not in to anal. I need to marry him, ASAP.
Dude your not gonna get by security covered in blood wearing only a robe
Don't worry I'm drunk they won't say anything
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
Sitting on an airplane reeking of booze, sex and shame while surrounded by families coming home from Disney. This is not one of my finer moments.
That sad moment when you flush your Molly down the toilet at the airport & watch your vacation slowly end..
It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
I feel like I just did it with Buster from Arrested Development. Taking a shower. #winefail
Woke up this morning with fake blood all over my bed which is a positive considering last year it was all real blood
Funny you say that, I just sold my stripper pole to my mom tonight...
What are you feeling right now?
Idk. I just flashed a porch 🤷🏼♀️
So not in the best place to do an emotional inventory
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