She used my dick as a microphone to sing "any way you want it" I'm in love.
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
Notice how both of our plans for hooking up with these guys involve getting them drunk?
Oh my God, we're like men but with great boobs.
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
HE FINALLY TEXT ME AND CALLED ME BY MY TWITTER NAME STAND BY FOR THE WEDDING INVITE, BRIDESMAID
Drinking from the bottle. In bed. Making dinosaur noises. Oh man.
Was he a virgin!? DID YOU TAKE A GUY'S VIRGINITY ON MY FLOOR!?
He asked if we were going to take advantage of his drunken state. When we said no he tired to show us what we were missing out on. It was so sad it almost made him cute.
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night
which are?
library sex.
I couldn't figure out what was more important, finishing the shot or putting out the fire on my leg.
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
You might see me up a tree with a deranged look in my eye , just walk away at that point
Randomize
