I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
He said I taste like butterscotch, licked me, then I'm pretty sure he wet his pants. So no, I do not want to invite him over.
Passive mediator is your role in this relationship. My role is dick punching arsonist
It's only Tuesday and I just measured and checked to see if my 6'5 Friday booty call will fit in the back of my jeep comfortably.
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
I'm ok. I've got the pantsless-with-dignity thing down pat
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
I do believe that seeing camel toe in leopard print pants at Walmart is the closest I will ever come to going on a safari
What I've learned from glowsticks: glowing things are not safe to eat
I turned off my domesticated goddess switch over 2 years ago and idk how to turn it back on. So in the mean time I'll dodge this gf bullet and eat free steak for as long as possible
I just want to order a very large pizza and get very drunk and very laid.
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
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