You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
i now have a sippy cup solely for the purpose of drinking alcohol out of...am i an alcoholic?
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
My tally is now official: I have been drunk every weekend since 2008. Cheers.
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
You drunk dialed me and told me to jump out of my second story window so I could give you head. I almost considered it.
you know, this Evan Williams whiskey isn't so bad when it's watered down a bit and you're home by yourself on a Saturday listening to Snoop Dog alone in your apartment without pants or any plans for your future...
Tell me you didn't really piss in the hookah.
She only spoke Russian, but she was so gorgeous it didn't matter
Oh. I think she ate all the cake and took our vodka...still gorgeous.
We were pulling the glow sticks off of him and he just kept yelling, "my bones! You're taking my bones!" and asking me if I was on the crew team
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
I've been wearing the same clothes for 3 days and they're covered in franzia
My doctor was like "I think adderall is a great choice. It'll definitely benefit you and you say you've taken it before so you'll be fine!" \nAnd I was like "yeah bro, totally"
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
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