Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
Do you think Conan would leave his wife for me?
he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
I'm more picky about my flip flops than the guys I sleep with
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This freshman just ran out of her seat in a 200 person lecture, opened the emergency door and vommed everywhere. Then quietly went back to her seat. $2 Pitchers hit someone hard last night.
Harry Potter. Singing. Sobering up. In that order.
LSHMSFOAIDMT = laughing so hard my sombrero falls off and I drop my taco.
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
I just don't know about this life anymore. Quite frankly I think I belong up there in the great blue, lounging on a cloud sippin tea with Jesus
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Would it be sharing too much to tell you that my nipples hurt so much that I couldn't comfortably go down the stairs?
Im organizing a group to help fondle my shoe. Too many shots dude. Too many.
i feel like i should invite him over so he can cockblock my roommate one last time before he graduates. for old times sake, ya know
I have weed and a speedo - I don't need anything else.
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
What! I said that you would fall in love? See I know better. Dark liquor makes me think everything is a dream. I barely remember saying that
Randomize