she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner"
I hate how you keep a running list of people who have seen me naked.
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
Just remembered I hit myself in the face with a bottle then did the nose test and decided I was still good. Don't think anyone noticed.
I said we should get a taxi and you were waving down cars, three of which were cops and one of them slowed down and shook his head then kept driving
He didn't think we needed a taxi
I think your high point was when the quesadilla was in your mouth and you were screaming "I can't chew!" and the Taco Bell guy just kinda stared at you like he wanted to strangle.
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
Fucking holidays. How do I have this many men who want to fuck me and none of them are available when I'm ready to blow my top?
I need a costume for that party. Even if I'm just taking it off.
You know it's time to call it a night when every guy in the bar (all 3 of them) have seen you naked at one time or another.
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
Sorry I missed your call. I was in the shower washing away my sins and sweat. Please tell me you want to get drunk as shit later.
He had a small dick and screamed "I will kill you if you don't get hard" to it in German...awkward time to have to explain I speak German too...
This is why you need to stop sleeping with freshmen.
Randomize
