Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
Decided against hooking up with creepy stalker guy for a ride to work. I feel I've earned a few self respect points back.
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
There's a fried egg and an empty bottle of reddiwhip in the parking lot. Did you have fun last night?
She made a roadhead CD. Can I marry her?
We where late for the party because we spent the last hour staring at a towl becase we thought it was a raccoon
Hey, I took a sweater from your house. And, um, your little brother's virginity.
Prepare for massive TMI but anyway long story short I have a Swiss flag band-aid across my balls.
What a patriot you are. How'd it happen?
You dropped my mother on the dance floor. She has a concussion. You didn't apologize. Don't speak to me for a while.
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
I love how my parents bring water bottles filled with vodka on family trips
So I ended the trip with two cold sores, poison ivy on my leg and vagina, and no alcohol or weed. WORST. 4TH. OF. JULY. EVER.
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
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