doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
He about cried when I ordered pizza online. He said it was a miracle.
She just used a chaser for red wine.
I opened my browser to a doctor page titled "serious pain under left side of ribcage". Last night must have been healthy.
I could literally track my booty calls if I ever got knocked up by my parking tickets
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
because. if I can't sit outside naked and eat my watermelon every morning then I really don't see the point in moving in with you.
My philosophy is thug life and that means never having to say your sorry for stealing drinks off tables
The last thing I searched on my phone was "leave in conditioner on cats." This is where my life is.
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
Yeah she let me pull the goalie and wear my USA flag like a cape since it was the first day of the world cup
I'm sitting at my kitchen table alone dressed as a dinosaur smoking bowls in the dark. Is this rock bottom? Or is this living the dream? Who's to say
im shaving my vagina and listening to frank sinatra, im coming over after
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
My dad told me that my grandparents are giving me $20,000 and my actual response was "do you know how many kittens I could buy with that?!?"
Randomize
