she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
And I'm PMSing. So if I'm not crying, I'm masturbating.
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
THAT WAS PROBABLY MY ONE CHANCE TO SLEEP WITH A MAN NAMED BORIS AND YOU RUINED IT.
New rule during sex: if it causes you to take your rings off, don't do it.
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
She whispered into my eat that she wanted me to fuck her while her parrot watched...
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
Fuck you for setting me up with the guy from the Nickelback cover band
Payback for not stopping me from fucking the guy in the wookie costume
He's texting from midnight mass asking for nude pics. Baby Jesus is spinning in his manger as we speak
im mad at you for telling me he ejaculated during "let it go." Thanks for ruining the song forever.
Took my plan b at Costco today, sample Sunday for the win.
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
Gave her a puke bucket just in case. She filled the bottom of it with tears. Super sad. Although I am super proud she didn't puke. That was a lot of Fireball.