I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
Now she's making me sit here and look at pictures of guys she likes who look like bears. She's calling them her bear friends.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
may have given a homeless man 70 dollars in exchange for his sandals. so yea, i'm going as jesus for next halloween.
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
I cannot take someone's straight and gay virginity in one threesome. It's just too much responsibility.
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
Ok fuckface listen up and listen good. 1.calling dibs on a chick out of your league is like applying for a job with a highlight video 2. dont fucking ski down the stairs again 3. if you do, put it on your highlight video
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
Lesson: Never rollerskate with a 40 in your hand unless you have a destination.
I had cheese pancakes which is pretty much just melting cheese in a frying pan and then eating it except youre in denial that your life is a wreck
My diet fell off the wagon when I began texting the pizza delivery guy my location on frat row.
Stop letting me drink while doing my makeup. I think I used sharpie for eyeliner.
im mourning your vaginas lack of frictional upkeep
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