So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
im sitting at a bagel shop wearing a princess crown hungover and have a sweater that is not mine.
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
After I gave him a handjob for a half an hour he told me I should be a taxidermist. I'm gonna take it as a compliment.
Standing in front of the open refrigerator with a 3/4 empty bottle of wine eating Bac-o's from the jar, topless. Somebody really should've taught me better coping skills.
Every time I get scared about the fact that I'm falling for him I remember that he juggles and is hung like a mastadon and everything is a-ok.
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
They got me high and left me at the mall with a giftcard for $400. I need an adult.
More cowboy butts than you can shake a stick at, oh joy.
My tuesday consisted of speaking to a federal agent for two hours and watching a roving band of gypsies jump over a fire until 2:30am
Signs of a stoner: trying everything in your fridge topped with peanut butter to seek satisfaction.
AHHHHHHHHH. I LEFT A GLASS NEXT TO ME WHEN I FELL ASLEEP I'M SO SURE IT WAS WATER BUT NOW IT'S VODKA JESUS MADE A STOP
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
You handed me your heels and said, "barefoot running is all the rage." Then you proceeded to run home.
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