check it out our google latitudes are spooning
Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
apparently i walked up to the counter, put $30 worth of snacks next to this girl, and went 'uhh i have no money'
just woke up in the beanbag bin at walmart
i bet if teenage jesus was here he would do a shot with me
Mom wants to know why I'm bringing a blender back to college.... didn't have the heart to tell her she's paying a $20,000 tuition for us to make margaritas and sleep through class
apparently he's bringing me two things i like. he said one was him and i'm assuming the other one is his penis
Oh shit. There are penis maracas
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
Also I am throwing a blaZer over what I wore to bed and calling it an outfit.
what better to celebrate not being pregnant than to eat a bowl full of rum soaked pineapples?
I woke up at 3am, top off, with campus security telling me to get dressed. Tonight was a GOOD NIGHT
He made a group chat with him, his wife, & I. Is this really life!??
You left your pants here again. 4th time in a row. How can you walk home without pants?
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
Randomize
