Reason #437 to hate Louisiana: Just went to the public bathroom at work. It was so humid the toilet seat was damp and sticky. Either it's the humidity or I sat in somebody's yesterday piss. I choose to believe the humidity.
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
you don't seem to understand just how much pasta i spilled on my bed last night.
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
Did you just reference Ludacris during my possible pregnancy scare of 2012?!
We have started to decorate penises.
The judge mental looks i am getting while looking at porn on my phone sitting in the urgent care waiting room is gonna get way worse when they find out im here to see if im pregnant
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
Def just threw up beer then brushed my teeth with some randos toothpaste now back to drinkin beer
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
All I remember about last st pattys day was I was in a bathtub with full bubbles, fully clothed, drinking out of a flamingo lawn ornament that someone cut a hole in.
Man, coughing on your period is like the biggest gamble a girl can make.
Found my paycheck. It was in the freezer
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