Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
I just opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a tube of mascara. Get on my level
im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
I didn't realize I was holding it, until I was like, "whose baby is this?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please don't be alarmed by the blood on my arms and phone in the morning. It's not mine.
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
If you value your immune system buddy, walk away from that one.
Oh my goodness please please please my inner slut needs some pampering, shes getting rusty and nothings worse than a rusty slut
I think mark twain said that originally
I just put bronzer on my abs to snapchat nudes. If that's not going hard I don't know what is
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
MIDGETS
????
I'll say this one last time. You are TWENTY FIVE YEARS OLD. You are not going to die alone and this is not the twilight of your life. Stop taking shrooms on your period!!!!
I just used a box o wine to refill a bottle o wine to more effectively drunk clean
I'm going to confession for the first time in 6 years. Where do I start, the gay sex or rampant alcoholism?
You know its a good night when ur woken up by the bartender asking you how he ended up at your house
That's the 3rd negative pregnancy test this month. I'm on a roll.
Randomize