A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed
the number of months ive had a girlfriend in my life divided by the number of blowjobs ive gotten is extremely depressing...
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
Game over. He has a paternity test request on his table.
I don't care what he thinks. My vagina has an open door policy.
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
I had a moment while I was smoking where I was looking at these palm trees and I knew how dr Seuss came up with his characters.
I think we should go through the tsa checkpoint with raging hardons when we go through LAX. I think we should pass out some viagra to everyone
Here's how he asked the pregnant girl for a cigarette. Hey yo prego throw me a square. Not joking.
THERE IS A WINE CUBE IN MY ASS THIS IS NOT GOING AS PLANNED
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
GUESS WHO STILL HAS BOTH NIPPLES!
Do you ever get high and look at your cat and feel like you know them on an intellectual level?
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
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