He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
Microwaved placenta is very unpleasant.
theres bread in your mailbox im going to eat it
nevermind its newpaper
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
Just bought two budlight beers with a can of tuna at the bar
He offered but I said no. I didn't think it'd be cool to accept cupcakes in the mens room of a gentlemans club.
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
Stripper with the black hair and lip rings is still asleep. Found out she wasn't lying when she said she was a squirter, it was like splash mountain.
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
Why is it so hot and why are these the only pants in my life.
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
I need you to go into my room and get some pants then bring them and four band aids to Sam's apartment no questions
She can't take shots?!? Literally if I could list that as a skill on a resume I would
Randomize
