Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face
I woke up to find her cooking breakfast wearing nothing but my Nuggets jersey. I don't think this could end better.
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
And when he pulled me off the bathroom floor, he just looked at the cat litter stuck to my chin and said "oh sweetie" and shook his head. I think my dad's officially given up hope.
Just saw someone tackle someone else to the ground for their coors light; he's not getting back up.
Yea, now that Irene is hitting us stores aren't selling any alcohol; beer is now a precious commodity.
My Internet history has 23 searches for 24 hour cake. Self respect plummeting.
I'm buying groceries with adderoll. I hope I'm never this broke again.
In an unrelated matter, im gonna eat you out so much later.
I've washed my hands three times and it still smells like Astroglide.
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
Some nights you do cocaine till 5:00 in the morning, and the next night you teach yourself how to crochet. It’s called balance.
She then told me, and I quote "I want to send you nudes just to see how you'd react."
Randomize
