Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
At least he's a nutritious stoner...
just stole 2 cases of forties from some freshman in the woods by pretending to be a cop. that ten dollar spotlight is really turning a profit
just passed out again, this time at a subway. On a positive not they gave me a free sandwich, pretty sure out pity but at this point i don't care
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
Yeah I said my new jacket was waterproof, not puke through your nose proof.
I respect the size of her balls.
Yeah but I don't respect the size of her anything else.
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
please tell me you're in jail and for some reason they have wifi
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Took me 10 minutes of oral to finally get him hard for like 30 seconds of sex until he came and passed out. Def not worth the ROI.
Funny, 'cause his story is it went great. He faked passing out so he wouldn't have to do anything in return.
Take your time. I'm mowing the lawn. In the dark. Drunk.
i asked my neighbor to open a bottle of vodka once and then we slept together
stupid neighbors doing stupid yard work with their stupid kids when i want to do drugs in the backyard
if i had an alexa it would be saying “have sex with guys that don’t care about you”
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
Randomize