We walked because you started screaming when you finally realized he wasn't Ben Bailey and it wasn't the Cash Cab.
Ever since I got married, I've become the MacGuyver of masturbation
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
Totally sleeping on a bloodstained mattress tonight. I love life's little adventures.
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
The doctor that gave me my std test is trying to hook me up with her daughter lol
You are my best friend, but sometimes best friends need to punch each other in the face
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
Dude. I’m playing chess through iMessage with a stripper. What has my life become.
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
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