also i tucked his toothbrush in my shirt. why? i dont know.
So My parents cut me off after I started making blood marys with hienz ketchup
Been considering the feasibility of adopting a kangaroo. Yes I'm very serious. And yes I'm very high.
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
I was wearing the shirt my little sister got for her birthday when the condom broke. I finally have it back to her and told her it was bad luck
I fell asleep masterbating while watching family guy... This is what happens when girl's night gets canceled
You don't know reunion panic until you've exfoliated your butt cheeks.
I'm sitting at dinner with my family looking over sexts. The thirst is far too real. They're talking about retail and I'm like haha, yes, you are all correct.
I'll like his pictures on Instagram every once and a while so that when he sees my name he is reminded of the best blow job he's ever gotten.
I feel like I'm in high school again. I'm completely sober and I just gave some guy a handjob to completion.
Remember the time you puked your contact lens out?
I told him I had the birth control implant in my arm and he looked me in the eyes, said "Science!" and came in me
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
You are a genius and a whore.
Met the hot new neighbor. She's into country music and giving really good bjs. Latter made up for the former.
Randomize
