How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
his blackberry tasks were 1. take names and 2. kick ass
my vagina's been through so much this weekend
you mean so much has been through your vagina this weekend?
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
I'm concerned I'll look like a hooker on new years eve in this outfit
There are different standards on new years eve. To look like a hooker you literally need to be giving a guy head on the street while he's handing you cash.
not saying it was a bad idea to throw an impromptu party but someone stole the microwave
I fell into his fridge. I want to leave.
I don't want to ruin date night, but you have no idea how hard it is to poop whilst looking at cute puppies.
On second thought, is it weird that I scheduled a surgery that determines my fertility around lingerie football night? I might have fucked up priorities.
Absolutely not. I would have done the exact same thing.
I want to be tan and drunk. Is that too much to ask for?
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
You told me you could hear my heartbeat through my penis but your methods were unethical.
Sixty five beats a minute. I stand by that.
Randomize
