Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
Just learned the hard way that dicks can bruise the back of your throat to the extent that you cant eat. You're dead to me.
You coming home soon, man?
HENBARSCLOSE
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
It's one of the many facets of my drunken alter egos. I'm like substance abuse batman.
Okay do all 29 year olds have erectile dysfunction or just the two I've slept with?
she just nodded and said "yeah, I'd fuck him for a reese's peanut butter cup". it's so nice to know I'm not the biggest whore living here
when my phone is in portrait view you can just assume i've been watching porn. that's the only thing i want to see in full view.
Would you be so kind as to inform your husband that my truck is forever cursed by mashed potatoes and it's his fault.
According to my Fitbit I was passed out in my car for 2 hours after she got us kicked out of the bar
Well. Another one of my exes came out of the closet.
I just bought a bottle of dried bees on Etsy. I am the wrong person to talk you out of this.
Randomize
