OH RELAX, IT WAS PITY SEX.....
I considered driving home in his mom's bathrobe until i realized i'd have to stop to buy cigarettes
If I see one more duchette wearing Ed Hardy, but not actually having a real tattoo. I swear Im gonna shank a bitch.
I wish life had little blips of pornography
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted
The liquor store wont accept checks from us anymore.
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
Both the cop and the paramedic were hitting on me while I was on the ambulance. My boob fell out and they just about had full on erections right there. They Came back two hours later to sign my cast with their phone numbers. #stillhotwhilebleeding
Bro. Some kids just drive-by judged the shit outta me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
Is there a greeting card for "I can't keep being The Other Woman"?
You called it motorboating but you just snot rocketed into my tits.
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
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