i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
New rule during sex: if it causes you to take your rings off, don't do it.
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
I cant tell which is worse. That its only my third time doing laundry this year or that its the first time ive done it sober.
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
In between rounds of sex, you stopped and did drunken handstand push-ups.
I started singing I believe I can fly in the shower and it was like the first stage of insanity
Id prob hit it, but i instagram edited her picture to make her look better. Ha. She should fuck me just for that.
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
You gotta have 1 orgasm for me and the rest can be for you. I'm living vicariously through you 😂
I'm really sorry I bit your mom last night, it was completely uncalled for.
Randomize
