She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
Just found a hundred dollar bill on the ground. Hope you're looking to drink tonight
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
It's like all my brain cells are screaming at me.
I'm dying.
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
I got kicked out of the bar for suggesting that the bartender drop her tits into my Redbull instead of the usual liquor
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
I woke up and found cookies in my purse. It's a 12/12/12 miracle.
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
No, just kidding. But your faith in me to throw a lesbian bridal shower makes me think I an pull it off. To the LGBT bar!
I just shaved my "bikini area" into a fucking pizza slice
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
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