Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
i called her out for picking her nose in public and he still wonders why i don't like her!
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
yo everyone went to the hospital last night
Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....
What's that word that means bigger and smaller and bigger and smaller, again?
Goddamn it, Jaime, it's 4am. Throbbing. The word is throbbing.
I guess I was trying to make a cheese sandwich, I had to change my sheets cuz I slept on it and the cheese melted all over me, Dave, and my bed
Also I'm very proud of th fact that I walked my dog before bed. Drunk dog walking should be an Olympic sport; it takes SKILLS.
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
You put me in such a good mood with that road head, I bought everyone at Hooters donuts.
My brother walked up to us as we were making out and was like "hey man, go to town!" and winked
It threw me off a little. I had to take a moment and ask myself, "Is he really fingering me in his mom's kitchen while I eat a whopper?"
The next time you invite me out to a bar full of cougars warn me first. I never felt like a piece of meat before.
Yeah, we got drunk and stole road signs.
How did the test come back?
I've never been so happy to have a yeast infection. And i got a free pack of birth control
Randomize
