My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
Sometimes I wonder why.. Then I realize I can't fool myself with that question bc we all know it's bc of his enormous dick
Hey man sorry, can't talk. I'm already taking risks by ripping the bong on this conference call.
This is the last pregnancy scare i've had since i was 12 and i thought you could get pregnant from masturbating.
I guess she thought her walk of shame would be more dignified if she stole my dog
I have so many hands. So. Many. Hands. I can feel arms that I don't have yet. They tickle. I can see the blood in my eyes. I think something is happening. The hands!!! I'm ticking myself with hands I don't have yet! I can't stop giggling about my notyet hands!
Theme for your birthday? Beer olympics in S&M costumes? Sounds like a nice little saturday
I am disappointed by everyone's lack of ability to dance on a stripper pole:(
I don't give a shit if you judge. This isn't about you or anyone else. This is about me and my chicken tenders.
Turns out I screen transfered my streaming trucker restroom porn vid to the downstairs neighbors'TV instead of my own, damn you chromecast
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
you were so high you asked for half double stack and half crispy chicken sandwich "welded together" in the wendy's drive through
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
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