It's fine actually... I'm pretty sure he had the crookedest weiner in the world anyway.
Like he had it hanging in the wind and you just decided, "nope, I don't think that one's for me." ????
God no! I could just feel it. His clock said it was 8:00 when, clearly, it should have been midnight.
Apparently throwing up on his dick didnt convince him to stay away . . . whats the most indirect way of saying "im just going to continue avoiding you"?
This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
Had a couple pieces of pizza for breakfast...suck on that Jamie Oliver.
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
Fastest blow job ever. Though it was probably a good thing since we were in front of my house.
We left at the same time. You got home three hours after I did and said you got your head stuck in a fence. I can't believe you don't remember this.
She just admitted to me that she was a pinecone.
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
I feel like I shouldn't have to explain to you why giving your cat weed was a bad idea.
And now we should drink to that moment where you realize you didn't exactly think things through.
We call her skankles because she's a skank and she has cankles, I thought that was obvious
With gravity the way it is and your butt clearly being the size of a bus you'd break your hip or something
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
Randomize
