Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
I found him CRAWLING across the garden. He saw me,smiled,and asked for a napkin.
Please tell me I did not ask the bartender how big his dick was.
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
My 19 year old brother just hooked up with his 45 year old cougar kindergarten teacher. These sorts of situations make me realize why the sorority girls call him Wondercock
My nonexistent future grandchildren will one day ask me when I knew I'd lost control of my life. And now I know.
I'm drinking vodka. Get ready for my famous "come over" mass snapchats
Things he's good at: oral sex and geometry. Things he's not good at: actual sex.
My diet fell off the wagon when I began texting the pizza delivery guy my location on frat row.
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
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