I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
It's going to be nice going to the airport without drugs taped to my balls like last year.
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
He's stoned as shit, eating breakfast cereal and taking a dump. All while listening to dubstep. We may never understand him.
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
I like it when Amish boys stare at my boobs, even tho I can't tell if it's in appreciation or disgust. Rumspringa, mothafuckers.
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
There is naked swordfighting and something green and alcoholic going on in the basement. COME. OVER. NOW.
Only Tommy would bring a stripper pole to a bonfire
I asked him for something to clean up with after sex and he handed me a sham wow. A SHAM WOW
I feel like my vagina was punched by chuck Norris, a Brazilian chuck Norris.
I wish I could be the kind of drunk Bobbi is... She stumbles around outside at 4am with a broken high heel and babbling about rainbows and getting dick...
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
Randomize
