PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
watching elf naked is so much better than watching it with clothes on .
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
If im paying 4grand for laser eye surgery, it better help with beer goggles cuz last night was pretty rough.
This is getting ridiculous. See/touch her boobs=good day. Not see/not touch her boobs=bad day. I am legitimately depressed over the lack of tits in my hands right now.
Theres a picture of you standing next to a John Wayne cardboard cutout that says dont drink and drive. your buddy is shirtless holding a beer and youre holding your keys up with marker on your face.
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
What happened to the good old days when we whispered the words beer pong and people came running?
I feel like I grabbed someones dick last night, & if I didn't I'll be disappointed in myself
Drunk enough that you donated $50 to taco bell, because they serve a great purpose.
I just watched this dude try to convince this girl to go home with him. She was like, That's cute, you're cute.and she just walked away. Man I'm so not drunk enough to be around this level of sad.
Getting drunk in an Applebee's pray for me
Lord god protect this child
I don't like how my gyno is telling me how to live my life.
I just broke a sweat masturbating on a Friday night. I may need a boyfriend.
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
Randomize
