Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
a kid in a transformers shirt tried to pick me up last night at work. he also rolled up on a bicycle, the kind with pedals. do i look that easy?
I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
you ran down to the water at 3am and rolled in the sand and ran around screaming that you were the corn dog monster.
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
Just pee around me
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
But I'll just tell people it was a bar fight... Sounds a lot better than "well I was drunk and alone and eating Special K naked in my bed"
Hi I haven't talked to you since you bought legal marijuana-are you still stoned?
Oh yeah. I pretty much fucked the universes brains out lastnight. It was glorious.
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
I never said it was inaccurate, I said I hate you.
How you doing tonight? I got my butthole licked so i cant complain.
My horoscope should say: you're an alcoholic, get help today, Pisces
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