VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
I'm sorry that you don't think that "Daddy Issues" are a real thing, but I can tell you that some assholes who never went to their daughter's dance recitals are responsible for getting me laid...continuously.
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
Crashed the mayor's bday party, no list for some reason. Wore suits. Ludacris was there.
So I found the perfect "Yeah I gained weight since high school but it went to all the right places" outfit for the reunion this weekend.
okay i am so sorry that i pulled a knife on you last night but seriously that woman knows how to throw a party.
When you wake up, just ignore the mess in the bathroom. I'll take her home when I'm off work.
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
At a bar in the city and the whole place starting singing “Happy Birthday” to someone. Everyone but me. The person next to me leaned over and said, “Why didn’t you sing along?!?” I responded, “I don’t know him. I don’t give a shit if he has a happy birthday.”
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
Randomize
