hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
The only reason I kept his number in my phone for so long is so that hed pay for my abortion.
Getting 10 cents back for every can is really just encouraging alcoholism.
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
i wish i could, but i promised myself i wouldn't sleep with anyone who couldn't grow a beard for a while. it's not you, it's crosby.
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
Post-shopping-cart-scooter-jousting victory fuck?
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
Suffice to say, I think if people ask about your bruises, and you look them right in the eye, and say "they're from fucking...", people would be like, "respect."
Have you ever seen death before? Bc it's me right now in yesterday's clothes.
Just a heads up that Dad just brought home a new Porsche and the sales girl he bought it from.
Umm okay. What are they doing?
They’re in the hot tub
Can I get divorced when I grow up?
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