i just wish he would text me so i could ignore his text and show him how little i care anymore
at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
Woke up in 100% not my clothes this morning. Third time this month. Fuck. Tequila.
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
Advice for you. Never grate cheese on your counter then not cleanup the scraps, then have your bf over and endup having sex on the counter. Theres literally cheese melted in and around my ass.
I was in the bathroom puking up mountains of tequila and when he came to help me, I held the door shut and kept yelling at him to let me be a lady.
When i'm home next we need to get baked and go to waffle house. I want to see if the waitress can still guess my intoxication level and what i'm about to order before i even make it to the table.
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
Lets just say I tried to pinky promise the cop... So I was fucked up.
6 more days and it'll be a year since i slept with him and never went home
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.
Randomize