I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
pretty sure i saw you masturbating on chatroulette a minute ago. yes, i can recognize your cock
I THOUGHT I SAW YOU
There was a punch bowl full of straight vodka. Glass bowl, ladle, vodka, and no punch at all. It was something of a rough night
I feel like my teeth are caked on with other teeth. What did I just smoke?
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
Making cookies for neighbors. Spill beer all over dough. Bake anyways. From good neighbors back to the shitty college kids next door in under 3 seconds.
She's calming us down by shoving oreos in our mouths
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
I'm having post-experience "why didn't I fuck her in a public bathroom" regrets
I feel like cursing someone's first born child right now. Like I wanna maleficent some bitch.
Thanks for your faith in my ability to stay sober while writing final essays. It's...unearned.
No, I'm just drunk and was excited cause a hot stranger bought me tacos.
I saw a spider on my bed and my first reaction was to throw my weed bag to safety
HE'S LIKE A GREEK GOD BUT HE'S FROM BOSTON. HE'S A BOSTON GOD
pray to him
I WANNA PRAY ON HIS DICK
Randomize
