Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
By the end of the second bowl I was making sound effects to every hand movement he made.
I successfully cooked a taquito with a lighter! My stomach hurts now tho.. im either guna blame it on the undercooked taquito or im feeling guily about porkin my brothers gf a lil bit ago
True story: Just left my solo cup on a cop car. Yesss
Apparently he always goes for the wrong girl so it should be easy for me to nail him.
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
Me and my vagina aren't speaking at the moment.
So neither of us had a dollar bill and we couldnt find a straw so we spent all nite doing coke through penne pasta
Why do I have the 4 of hearts in my bra?
Haha we got sick of drinking on 4 is for whores so we stole the cards...I woke up with three of them in mine
drunken problem solving at its finest
Someone keeps hanging up bible verse posters in the bathroom stall I masturbate in at work.
You know what i hate? I hate when the ppl you drunkenly made out with actually want to talk to you sober. It just doesn't work that way sir.
Just bought shot glasses from the thrift store. I think the guy buying a winter coat was even judging me.
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