i can hardly tell the difference between falling asleep and passing out anymore
Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
I was passed out in a dog food bowl tor two hours. Just tapped my dinner beer. I love homecoming.
I don't know what he did to me, but he did it wrong. I think my pelvis is broken. I cant even drive without it hurting. What. The. Fuck.
I took the weekend off because he and I were supposed to go to Vegas for our anniversary and get a hooker remember?
Ah, yes. Who says romance is dead?
No, the moral of my Oxford interview was "Never snort caffeine pills".
My brother slept till 4, bought a sword, got drunk and sharpened said sword. I went to corporate compliance training. Life is not fair.
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
In Punta Cana for my bachelor trip, hopefully tomorrow my passport is blacklisted
Sorry about my life...
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
He grabbed at it like it was a stress ball or something. It's a boob, not a grapefruit. The fuck.
Randomize
