I wish I could rss feed the hooker ads on craigslist because it looks suspicious that I check craigslist every hour.
What time do you think the pilgrims started drinking? I want to be as accurate as possible.
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
i think if i got caught drinking at work i could get away with it if i started crying and saying my cat just died. as long as i'm confident.
So I know we're not talking about this anymore buuuuuut I left heel marks on the wall.
I need to stop drinking alone, I wrote a love letter to my tattoos
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
He was so aggressive it felt like he was giving my boob a root cannal
He's interpretive dancing to Crazy by Britney Spears and expressing his feelings for either me or the guy next to us
So I just watched a seagul attack my boss and steal his food in the parking lot. Today might not be a bad day lmfao.
Man, I'm never going tanning again he noticed the burns on my ass
Randomize
