Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
i don't have fun when you have fun. i have embarrassment, fear, and significantly less cash in my wallet.
i wanna give whoever invented massage chairs a blow job.
I decided to follow my clitoris instead of my heart.
17 year olds will be the death of me.
you know something has gone wrong in your life when you've gotten a court order to stay away from ALL mc donalds.
she's my drunk super hero.
She kept saying my hands are a cupcake factory
Well I tried to steal a golf cart. I fought with the Chick-Fil-A cow. And other things.
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
I don't think my body can handle the alcohol I want to put in it anymore.
Dad had me doing shots of chocolate mint Everclear last night. I've never felt closer to him.
After getting all 4 of my wisdom teeth removed I asked my dentist how much better would I be at head
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
it’s about to be september and all i keep thinking is what if i go (another) full calendar year without having sex?
Randomize
