so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
Hey do you think you can sew an adult onsie with easy access if you know what I mean!!?? It must have bunny feet.
Bonus points if someone shits their pants. Only 1/2 bonus points if it's you
Bonus points are bonus points regardless
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
Unlike bears, this weekend is not the #1 threat to America. It is, however, the #1 threat to my liver
Like I feel like I use my high IQ for the wrong things
Opted for cash back rather than the 10% extra I'd get for store credit, solely for drinks tonight.
You're lovely.
I asked him if we were going to get arrested for doing it in the bar parking lot. "Absolutly not" said the guy getting the blow job...
It's one of those "I can't stand you but we're stuck in the same hotel room tonight so let's fuck until one of us passes out" kind of nights.
I just found a bag of chex mix in my clutch
You were feeding it to the bartender last night
Just do what I do and listen to your vagina. She’ll growl when she smells good dick
Randomize
