when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
He just told me his cousin just died and I look like her. Reconsidering the sex.
The make-up sex just reminded me why we broke up in the first place.
I was tripping so hard I was disappointed when I pulled back the shower curtain and shrek wasn't standing there
Now that there's no chance of him coming over to fuck anymore, I'm going to put up a one-person tent in my bedroom and live in it. My bed reminds me of him.
thank you for extending my knowledge of the effects of vodka. speak of what happened last night and i will kill you and send your fingers to your loved ones.
Made out with a mannequin all morning in cpr training, so im ready to party
For Halloween this year I'm going to paint myself in gold, wear a golden toga and sash saying " cunt goddess"
Hey, I'm making progress. I haven't thrown up in a bar while wearing a sweater vest in almost two months.
Figured out why that fly won't leave. It keeps buzzing through my weed smoke
Fly high, Fly.
My mind just played a snippet of me asking to be a Joey and trying to climb into your apron pocket...
And to celebrate the raising of our lord I just purchased a bunny buttplug. Am I doing this Easter thing right?
Fuck you and fuck your stupid hat
I just realized that Margarita Wednesdays are so much better now when followed by No Work Thursdays.
..and by hang out i don't mean fucking then going back home i mean let's get something to eat & watch a movie and fuck sometime in between.
Randomize
