I am at a bar watching a rat tail get braided.
She said she could kiss it, just not put it in her mouth. Because that would be cheating..
I'm drunk and I'm watching it's Alwyas Sunny and eating candy. Even I am jealosu of my life
Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
remember what we learned. dont lure girls w/ food at the bar. u dont want those ones
Just mixed vicodin and mucinex. This cold just got fun.
You could say the cab driver was less than excited when we called his personal cell phone at 4am for directions back to our hotel after having blacked out at the club
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
Nothing is worse than post drunken playoff baseball loss sex
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The fact that it was "anything but a cup" now explains the cowboy boots and fishbowl aftermath at the apartment.
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
I just had a sexting conversation using medieval jargon. I think he is a fine suitor.
his mom fetish really needs to stop. this is literally the 5th time i've come home from work and there's been some random skank and her kids in the living room.
did one of the kids use their poo like a crayon on the wall this time?
I spanked her so hard I woke up Grandma
how do you know everyone's mad at you?
I just woke up feeling shameful
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