I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
highlight from tonight: i hit on her and her mother.
The walk of shame is far, far worse on crutches.
took out my tampon, fucked him, and put a new one back in all before he realized I was on my period. beat that one bitch.
Keanu Reeves Photobombed A Couple’s Wedding Photos As A Perfect Gift
I made the bartender pinky promise me there was still vodka in my drinks.
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
I'm too afraid that I'm 1. Banned or 2. Gonna be noticed by the lady bouncer I punched.
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there is a money trail leading from my bathroom to my living room.. the trail ends with a half eaten bag of chips with a note that says "magical chipz".. who am i?
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
I dunno what the deal was, but you spent about an hour trying to put your phone charger in the outlet and you were yelling "one plug to rule them all"
you really need to remember next time not to write your name and phone number on the paper its wrapped in.
But what if it got lost?
its illegal. you dont want people to contact you if they find it.
holy shit I just remembered that story I told about Tom hanks going bowling while high.
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.