Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
Odds of those being real?
One in who gives a fuck
It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
So he asked me last night if I would cheer him on while he masturbated...
Just woke up in bed, AC on high, with a fresh pack of smokes, an unopened pint of vodka, and a bag w a beef patty w cheese in it. I think my roommate's like the toothfairy or something. Or that was way more Xanax than I needed.
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
FYI angry masturbation is not as cool angry sex
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
There are pictures of you on the shoulders of some old guy dressed as borat
I ended up with bruises on the back of my knees. Tell me again how I did this?
Just got shoved by an Elvis impersonator. Evidently it isn't cool to ask how much of a disappointment they are in the eyes of their parents.
Yess he was literally so drunk that like at one point I'm pretty sure he thought it was hard and in when neither were true :/ haha
Can we just take a minute to acknowledge that you're drinking with your gay ex boyfriend's DAD who is a DEACON??
Randomize
